I am at a all time low. It’s that kind of low you feel when you are back to ground zero. It’s the entrepreneur low, to see what you had built, demolished into pieces by metallic bulldozers. It’s that low, people do not see in magazines or news. It’s that low, that most people feel everyday, when they think they are close to the moon, only to realise – they can’t touch the moon.
It’s that low, when people disappoint you. It’s that low, when p
eople misunderstand you. It’s low, low and low. Like a hole.
We are afraid to show we are at the low, the society only wants to see Ferraris and FHM, pinnacles of success dotting the city skyline.
The low is not a new sensation to me, it’s an everyday sensation, that sensation that eats you starting from within your stomach, crawling outwards like a hungry worm, eating up your intestines, followed by your liver, and to the lungs. It then coils around your heart, and squeezes it slowly, like a coiling snake. Your heart stops beating, and you are left with the silence. The silence. The limbo. The limbo state whereby you do not know if it is a never ending dream – or reality. It’s a state that can last forever, or it is just a blink of an eye in the real world.
You wake up from the limbo. Another bad dream. You look at your Ferrari and wife. You drink another whiskey or two. The day starts again, from blank zero. You fight, kill, and force your way to the top. And when you are at the top, you realise that you had did it all for nothing. All these do not mean anything to you. They are things you can’t take with you to the next world.
I am at the low now, till I figure out what is my high.
I know writing is my high.
I might be back.
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AVERRAL writes under pen name Scarlet Risqué. She stars in Scarlet Queen YouTube with over a million views. She holds a degree in business. The RED HOURGLASS is ranked Top 50 Espionage Thriller on Amazon. She is currently writing the sequels to the Hourglass Series. Grab a free copy of her novel now RED HOURGLASS on Amazon |
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