I want to be that girl who sews your heart with a thread, and take you to places you had never been before.
I want to be that fantasy girl you desire, I want to please your every wishes and command.
I want to be perfection in your eyes, I want to be the best I can be each day with you
I am night and day, black and white, I am your maiden and whore, I am yin and yang in one
I can be that domineering Risque that inflicts you with the utmost pain
I can be that subdued Cheryl that listens to your every whisper.
I can be anything you want, as long… you say you love me too.
I found the masked man of my dreams in you. While you sleep on the bed at night, with your mask over your nose, breathing heavily to sleep as I rest on your arm looking at you.
I had seen you filtering in and out of my dreams like a phantom, like a ghost. Now that you are beside me I can see hope restored to my future again. You give me a new meaning of life, you are now the air that I breathe, the soul that I desire to possess, the man that I want to look after. You are everything that I want, truly madly deeply, I found my reflection in yours. I can feel your pain, and agony, I can see your future, your potential. I can… Feel you in me.
Your intensity is animalistic and primal, your instincts are raging mad, under the calmness you exude, you are burning deep within with your volcanic sea of emotions.
Your mind is blown away by your scorpion queen, you will only dream of her, and her only. She will continue to torment you day and night till you please her, worship her, and be the man she wants you to be.
As equally to yours, I am trapped in the mental cage you had put me in. You promise me a world of hope away from the suffering and pain. You keep secrets and you intrigue me daily with your conflicting actions and words. You don’t mean what you say you know that? You only mean what you do, the action that you take. The house key that you gave me. The hand that stretches out to hold onto mine, locking your eyes into my mind. You don’t want me to leave. You want me here, with you. You have been alone for too long, you slept countless of miserable nights in agony of love, you tried to run away from your emotions for too long, by obsessing over your work day and night. But you can’t run from me now, Vincent, because I see through you. I know what you are. You are…. my king.
Are you ready, my scorpion boy, my dark mysterious phantom of the night. Now that I have you under my spell, and I am trapped in the mystery of your mind, we are bounded together…. as one.
Imagine the futures we can create together, the realities we can dominate, the power we can have together. I will see you in the boardroom beside me.. One day, as lovers as partners as your wildest fantasy come true. I want to be perfect and imperfect in your eyes, I want to show you my weakness and my strengths, I want you… forever.
We beat the odds to have met each other, on New Year’s Eve. All this time I was looking for you, my mystery man behind the mask. I couldn’t see you in my dreams, only vividly. Only partially as you caress my body with your long fingers, stroking me tenderly like the keys on the piano, in black and white.
“Did you do the The Scarlet Queen Channel on your own?”
“Yes. I write the script, rehearse, act and record it from start to finish.” “I don’t believe it. You must have someone helping you.
“Heh. No. I do get ideas from everywhere but, I am doing it on my own.”
Initially, I found it very tough to act as Risque, she drains the shit out of me. When I write her lines, she morphs it into something so twisted, that when I watch her videos, I can’t believe she did that. She is quite a wild thing, with a wild laughter. I don’t really remember much when I am acting as her.
Now, I find it tougher to act as Cheryl, because she encompasses so much pain, I feel like I am drowning in that oasis she speaks about in her piano song. I composed the song many years back, at one of the lowest points of my life. I used to play the song on the piano to feel better. That is the song Cheryl plays, a song of pain, a song of betrayal, a song of… hope. Acting as Cheryl gives me the most pain, and its getting tougher, as her scenes are going to be trans formative.
As I don’t want to make it sound like I am sprouting magic, I spent two months developing the concept of the video series, hence the product of which, the daily series of The Scarlet Queen is, is my imagination. I have to enforce that it is a solo project, and my sanity is at sake. I don’t know if I can do it past episode 50 at the rate of deterioration I am facing. I want to cut it short and just battle it out and stop the filler episodes of built up and suspense and get down to direct business. However, I am trying to slow it down, but I want it to go faster. See the contradiction?
To enlighten my viewers, I have been practicing aerobatics for the past two days, for a scene for Cheryl. I am currently trying to choreograph an aerobatic dance to symbolise her personality and struggles. I hope to release her Swan Dance for episode 20, or earlier.
At this stage of the production, I am dancing about 4 hours on average for 5 days a week. I feel incredibly fit… my muscles are aching but it feels good. My heart is breaking inside, my soul is being tested, my physical limits are being pushed. I want that all… because I want to be stronger.
I had dedicated my life to the craft of artistry and there is no turning back.
In the dark alleys of Arab streets, there are three outcasts. At nightfall, away from pointing fingers and stares of disgust – in their tattooed world of sesha dreams and lusty desires – an escape – or a curse.
One pierced with sorrows of the past, into her heart, a metal dislodged underneath her skin, leaving a permanent scar – her innocence, driven her to desperation – if only he could see her insanity for him – if only. he loved her.
The other, with an obsession with occupying her void, not wanting any silence in her world – for it tears her insides out – if there is no sound left, she would scream till the sun cracks the skies.
The last, with the responsibility – to balance their insanity – into a realism – he shoulders the responsibility – but is not clear either – if he is in a sesha dream or a world of sex and drugs.
Empty spaces – what are we living for?
Abandoned places – I guess we know the score..
On and on!
Does anybody know what we are looking for?
Another hero – another mindless crime.
Behind the curtain, in the pantomime.
Hold the line!
Does anybody want to take it anymore?
The Show must go on!
The Show must go on!Yeah!
Inside my heart is breaking,
My make-up may be flaking,
But my smile, still, stays on!
Whatever happens, I’ll leave it all to chance.
Another heartache – another failed romance.
On and on…
Does anybody know what we are living for?
I guess i’m learning
I must be warmer now..
I’ll soon be turning, round the corner now.
Outside the dawn is breaking,
But inside in the dark I’m aching to be free!
The Show must go on!
The Show must go on! Yeah,yeah!
Ooh! Inside my heart is breaking!
My make-up may be flaking…
But my smile, still, stays on!
Yeah! oh oh oh
My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies,
Fairy tales of yesterday, will grow but never die,
I can fly, my friends!
The Show must go on! Yeah!
The Show must go on!
I’ll face it with a grin!
I’m never giving in!
On with the show!
I’ll top the bill!
I’ll overkill!
I have to find the will to carry on!
On with the,
On with the show!
